"As Christians, we are to be grounded in this identity, even as we add other roles and ways to express that identity in relationship to others. We might have an interesting job for a season. We might be married for a season. We might have children at home for a season. But those things can be taken away from us — or never given to us at all. They are gifts for this life only. Jesus has promised that if we choose to sit at his feet, we have made the best choice of all. We will inherit the better portion, that which will never be taken away: a relationship with God, his word, and the promise of eternal rewards and life with him in heaven."
-Carolyn McCulley, Women, Work, and Our Crisis of Identity.
I couldn't help but feel a sense of peace as I read this article yesterday.
I was up to my elbows in dirty dishes, both kids were screaming after some sub-par afternoon naps, I was planning on making spaghetti for dinner again and I was feeling totally inadequate as a wife/mother/housekeeper.
I was getting tired of feeling like all I did was make sure the kids didn't kill each other, dinner was on the table when Hubs got home and the house didn't look like a total wreck. I was wondering what my future would hold in the next few, short years when my kids would start school. These years of staying home with my young children have gone so slowly yet so fast. What would I do when they started school? Where/how would I go back to work? How would all of our family relationships change? Who am I, who will I be when my children are more independent?
Then I saw this article on my Facebook news feed and was reminded that life is indeed a vapor. When I am feeling overwhelmed in the midst of my mothering duties, when I most certainty fail, when I worry about whatever is ahead, I can remember that life consists of seasons. Nothing lasts forever. Each season is a gift. And these seasons of being a wife and mother will only have lasting, real value if I am asking myself this question: Am I seeking Jesus' face in this season?
All of the blogs, articles, doctors, books, etc. that tell us how to be better wives, mothers and women are inferior compared to that question. As I thought about it, I realized how much I do struggle with listening to the still, small Voice that seeks to shape my life and my heart. So often I let the 'tyranny of the urgent', other people or my own selfish desires define my identity. All of these things will burn up like chaff. I only need to listen to His voice.
As a response to these thoughts I'm trying to take more time to do what I feel the Lord is directing me to do instead of falling prey to my own "must-do" list. In reality, that can wait. First and foremost I must feed my heart by sitting at Jesus' feet and hearing His voice. Only then will I be able to stand in my identity as a daughter of Christ, no matter how the day turns out, what roles I have in this life, or what my future holds. That identity will shine forth as gold when I finally see Jesus face to face, and I want to hear Him say, "Well done, good and faithful servant."