"Whoever finds his life will lose it, and whoever loses his life for my sake will find it."
-Jesus, Matthew 10:39
My whole family is sick. Baby, husband and me. Although I think baby may just be teething, but she is miserable nonetheless. I have a sore throat and can't sleep. I'm currently writing this post at 11:04 p.m.
I know that 7 a.m. is coming. My husband will need to get up for work. He will need breakfast. Baby will wake up around then or before. She will be hungry and need a diaper change. There is housework to be done, books to be read, meals to prepare, toys to be played with. In all honesty, all I want to do is hide under the covers and never come out. But that's not what Jesus calls me to do. Instead of indulging my selfishness, He wants me to lose "my life". I think we all know what that means: our plans, our agendas, our wants. So much of that can take over in all aspects of our lives. In our marriage, it can look like we are standing up for ourselves. But are we really doing that when we whine at our husband's requests, roll our eyes at his ideas and suggestions, or refuse to make him that bowl of popcorn at the end of a hectic day?
I'm preaching to myself here. Instead of losing it in the sense that he doesn't care about our wants, desires or feelings, can we trust God to care for us while we care for our husbands and families, even when we aren't at our physical or emotional peak? Can we know that as we pour ourselves out for others, God will sustain us and give us moments of grace and rest when we need it the most? I'm banking on that tomorrow.
I fully intend on losing it...losing "my life" for my husband and family for the sake of Christ's glory. He will care for me, so I will care for those I love.
And I'll make some Italian wedding soup in the slow cooker and take it easy!