"Be acquainted, then, with thine own heart: though it be deep, search it; though it be dark, inquire into it; though it give all its distempers other names than what are their due, believe it not."
-John Owen, quoted in this great blog post, emphasis mine
How many times have we girls been told to "follow our heart?" This holds true in many facets of life, but it makes a big appearance in romantic relationships. I fell into it. It's so easy to make decisions or assumptions based on our emotions (that's what *most* women do, right?) It's so easy to assume in our hearts that our husband did (or didn't) do something because he wants to "get back" at us, because he doesn't love us, because he's selfish, etc. etc. etc.
Don't be so sure. We can't trust our own hearts to make judgments in our relationships. The wise prophet Jeremiah said, "The heart is deceitful above all things and beyond cure. Who can understand it?" (Jer. 17:9). We can make assumptions out of our own hearts that aren't really true and end up hurting our relationships in the long run. The solution? Like Owen says, "believe it not". Know your tendencies. Do you get depressed and withdrawn when your husband disappoints you? Do you lash out in anger? I challenge you to step back in those sorts of situations and take a look at what is going on in your heart. Then, instead of making that assumption, take a break from the situation. Think about your husband's perspective. Pray. Take a deep breath. Talk with your husband about your feelings and reactions so you can understand him and yourself a bit better. And instead of trusting your heart, know the wickedness inside of it and entrust yourself to Jesus. He is the one who can change you and help you understand yourself and your husband more and more each day.